Sharks Can Bite Me

Don't let that friendly grin fool you; trust me, this motherfucker wants to eat you.

You know how lifeguards would blow their whistle at you if you didn’t exit the deep end fast enough after jumping off the diving board? Yeah, that shit never happened to me. I got out of the water so fast that my swimsuit was dry before my foot touched the top rung of the ladder. Then […]